Clover

"If a man expects a woman to be an angel in his life, he must first create a Heaven for her. And if a woman expects a man to be a bank, she must deposits first before requesting for a withdrawal"

♥

Honey

As valentine's day is here, let me just voice out what I think. There was a saying about those guys who are seriously getting involved in relationships, they'll talk of marriage, they'll always let you know that you're going to be their bride in a fine day soon. But I disagreed with that. Don't ever trust the words, trust the actions. I don't think anyone should ever bringing up the topic of holy marriage to every person they had some special kind of connection with. That only makes the proposal is nothing but a cheap, meaningless, disposable thing. Maybe there are young ladies out there who love those cheesy stuffs, but I guess I'm not one of them. Well I used to be like them, but now not anymore. I mean, can't you just live the moment? Perhaps, getting to know each other's favourite food, the type of music they listened to at the end of a gloomy day, her treasured flowers, his best loved places and so on. There are tons of thing you should learn about someone for the time being, before you even dare to speak of "let's get married". Come on! We may be nothing like all the white couples out there, but at least just try to steal some of their classy parts of the way they recognized each others' strengths and weaknesses first, before they get down on one knee, hand out a ring and hear a "yes". Now that's a true gentleman. But don't you ever give a shot on the sex before marriage part, or anything around that neighbourhood. Don't.

♥

Dove

So yesterday I safely reached home after a weekend spent in Kelantan with the fams, except for Abemi as usual, he didn't tag along, whatever. Attended a relative's wedding, I didn't even recognized who is it but nevermind. It was nice, catching up with few people who I haven't met for years, who knew me since I was a baby (but I didn't even remember any of them, sorry for that). My cousin's kids grow up very well now, man, I'm getting so old! Anyway, we'll be going to Terengganu this Thursday if all goes well, just having a quick fun days before the hustle bustle comes rushing to us later on. All these can probably takes my mind off for a while from everything, just everything that messed up with my head and my heart. 

Oh, one more thing. I got a call from Bursa Malaysia last week. Been offered to join a SL1M programme for 8 months with allowance given for RM 1500 per month. But there was no guaranteed that I can be a staff member once the training programme ended. I was surprised. Deep down I don't wanna stay in my comfort zone for too long, UKM it is. I wanna grow, I wanna learn more, improve my weaknesses, be more professional. But my parents would like me to just stay in UKM. Okay, admit this, even your parents aren't gonna let you settle for something less than you deserved, right? They won't let their kids experience a rough patch in life. But, my parents had a strong point, I'll live better, I'll save more money, I'll eat well, if I just stay. If I decide to walk the new road, it's going to be harder, even harder with the fact that I have to do it all alone. Urm, I'm really bad in making decisions. 

♥

High Hopes

All fair and square now. Guess no one even own the benefits. I can really, seriously, stop hoping for things to work again with him. It's just too impossible to happen, though I really wanted us to ended up together ever since the beginning of our story. We're not destined for each other. That's all that I can come out after all the hurdles. I guess I should never turning back from now on. Last night and also tonight, let's consider it as the last bit of honesty and happiness that I deserve before I head on to a whole new life, a whole new me. Oh God, thank you for the sweet pleasure and a temporary satisfaction that you gave me. I've been missing him for months and only watching him from distance. To get to talk to him again after all the suffers alone, it was a bit refreshing. Okay, spend your February very well now, guys. I'll be quite busy this month. See ya! 
♥