Fatin&Aidil

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I'm Good

A week has just passed since I've started working again in the same place where I used to be a trainee student for the past 3 months. The pay's much more than the internship allowance, well it's a 6 months contract only. That's more than enough time for me to find a real job. Plus point, everyone in the office knows me well, they treat me better and it feels like home, y'know. In fact, we've moved to a new office, a wayyyy much better one with a great scenery and surrounding. It's at the highest floor in the building where you could just stand there and witness such a breathless view from the top. Mmm yeah it's tiring as hell waking up in the morning, finishing tasks with a short deadline, getting back home and feeling not in the mood to do anything except crawling into bed and get a long deep sleep. But this could helped me to forget some things that I don't want to remember. Anyway, I'm going to graduate a month from now. Not feel like going, but my parents insisted to go, sigh. Really hope I can persuade my brothers to tag along, 'cause I need someone to be my photographer of the day.

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Last Letter

No more stupid excuses that can be made now, that was the very last text I sent to him. That should be enough to let he know how thankful I am for his help before, and also for everything. It's been really nice knowing you Ariz. Though it's really impossible for you to read my blog, all those posts that I mostly wrote about you (which by now I've deleted them all), but with your existence in my life even just for a while, you made me feel deep in love again. Like there was finally hope for something new, something better. But I guess I am who I am. Still can't change the fact that I could hardly believed any guy I met. Couldn't stop being complicated, being afraid of getting hurt, getting dumped, and been ignored. Because, oh God, I loved you like crazy. I hated when you weren't there with me. I missed you all the time. I got jealous when I saw you hit the like button on some other girls' photos on instagram (yeah I know that was absurd). It sucks to wait for your calls for hours, and falled asleep when I was mad at you for not be there and just talk to me. Not much that I asked for. But maybe it was my fault too for putting all the blames on you. I said stupid things without thinking much and now here we are, being nothing like two strangers. Guess I don't see what you were struggling with. Guys could get hurt too hah. I forgot that, I'm sorry. You meant everything to me and in your heart I'd like to stay. But all that I've done was hurting you. So. Won't shake your feelings again. Won't stalk your twitter and play hide and seek again. Won't save your number anymore. Won't write about you anymore. Won't make any move on you anymore. I'll stay away from you forever.

For every 4th January of more years to come, happy birthday Ariz.

Love, Alynn ♥

Everglow

So! Today we went to KL to find the dresses for bridesmaids-to-be (yup that's us!), it's for Fatin's upcoming wedding on 29th October. Yeah it's less than a month from now! Originally, I didn't wanna be one of the bridemaids 'cause my height's gonna ruin the beautiful picture of their own. That's an honest speaking, but then she added me in the bridesmaids' whatsapp group this morning. So I thought I gotta do this for her. And, oh God, it took us hours to find the dress without her being there with us ! We could only called her and sent pictures like a thousand times. Finally found the dress, bought six of them, not my fav though, but still I just followed the flow. Well in my opinion, we should've just bought the white one instead of the maroon 'cause Fatin and her partner will be in pastel green, think they'll be sinking in that maroon, I don't know. But whatever, thank God it's over now I can cuddle with my pillows. Thanks babes!

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