Cold Flames

I still can't get over how hot Zayn is in this video, you guys please don't get bother by the explicit contents, okay. Did you heard it? About his recent breakup with Gigi. Soon as I heard the news spreaded, I straight away looked into his instagram. You know at first I thought salah ig ke apa ni, but I wasn't wrong. It was Zayn's, but it wasn't like how it used to be. There were a bunch of shirtless photos, too many selfies per day, quotes and whatnots. Guess he must be having a hard time. 'Cause the Zayn that Ninna know (she has always been Zayn's die hard fan so yeah, she knows the whole damn thing), and that I barely know, or I'm just guessing (I only know that he's good looking); he's a mysterious kinda guy. Not one to open up too much to public either, except for his own musics. Hmm, poor soul. ♥

Raw

I criticized myself a whole lot more than people did of me. I feel like I never been really important to certain people who I love to the fullest. I don't know. Perhaps I don't give enough, that's why I don't feel enough. Oh I would love to blame the ups and downs of this hormone thingy. But nevermind. It would've been a lie if I said I never thought of getting out of this house and start over somewhere else alone, or another worst case of scenario, committing suicide. Just to see if there are people who really cry over me. I need to know, if there's at least one people who can't live without me. But thank God, I'm still sane and I'm not even gonna do anything that'll break the law in my religion. But yeah, that's what I feel when almost everytime it hits me. Knowing the fact that I couldn't even talked to someone about it, that's just very devastating to me. At this moment, I'd cry right away if I heard anyone asked me, "are you okay?". 'Cause I'm really not. I would appreciate it if the same question been asked to me like every single day, so I'll know that whenever I'm not feeling fine, there'll be a pair of ears and shoulders for me to lean on, to cry on. 

♥