Strength

I've been on my bed since Friday and cried so much because of few things. What happened was I feel like I being rude to my parents, words mixed between hidden feelings and the hope so they would try to understand what I feel, it was the first time ever I exploded. But that wasn't a good move, I pleaded guilty and I've apologised but I don't know if they forgive me, I don't know, I'm scared to know. I was so down I refused to talk or meet anyone at the moment. M got really mad at me for pushing him away too instead of telling him the truth. I was worried that he might walk away if he knows this. Oh God, he kept on forcing me to the point I feel like ugh let me just walk away (but I didn't), but then he called me around 3 a.m (after 15 missed calls) and we talked about it. Didn't plan to show him my fragile side, didn't wanna let him hear me crying either. But it happened anyway. I really hate when he dissed me, I never wanna hear those bad words again ugh! Oh Asmira called me up and she could tell right away that I wasn't okay, so I cried again. But after all those tears, I actually ended my weekend this time around having a quick catch-up with my highschool bestfriends, Kila and Ayon. That ended with lotsa laughters, stupid funny looking bitches. Miss them and the rests already! Just don't get married too early, okay?

♥